Intensive care: Experiences of family & friends

Interview 03: We then just literally drove, not knowing at all what was going to be at the other end. And I  know all the time all I kept thinking was just be alive. If you're alive when I get there, it's going to be okay. And it sort of just kept me going and it's-, you're all in a real numb state. I mean, we all remember the journey very very clearly. I mean, how my husband drove, I don't know, but you, you're just completely all in your own thoughts. We couldn't comfort the children. We didn't know what we were going to find.

Interview 01: Well I think probably, inevitably, relationships with the family have been strengthened.

Interview 07, Father: The outcome of this was that, in fact, we were, although the visiting hours for the ward were quite limited. And in the afternoon we actually had permission to go in at any time to feed him. And to help in his care.

Mother: At that point he was still quite agitated. He couldn't vocalize except to growl or roar. So when they tried to, do something with the catheter, he would scream the house down. He wouldn't allow them to feed him. So they said, would I go in and do lunch as well as dinner? Which, of course I would.

Interview 14: And he said, 'Oh I can't do this, and I can't do that' and I said, 'No, but you are alive,' I said, 'What you have got to remember is that you nearly died, but you didn't, you are here, so you have got to say to yourself now every day is a bonus.' So we live life to the full.

Interview 36: As worrying as it is and as, as scared as you are about what the outcome may be and you fear to ask the question because you may not like the answer, or the answer may frighten you.  Ask away, ask away because you, you learn so much from that and, and those in intensive care, and I've no reason to believe any different are the same as it was that that was my dad, they’ll answer any question you've got,  they’ll even come forward with information for you. I think it's important to ask.