Interview HA24
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Age at interview: 58
Age at diagnosis: 57
Brief Outline: Heart attack 2002. Current medication' aspirin, ramipril, nicorandil, Tildieum Retard, GTN, atorvastatin. Diagnosed Cardiac Syndrome X 2003
Background: Retired Psychiatric Care Assistant; Married, 4 children
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Describes the mixture of emotions he felt when he had a heart attack.
Describes the mixture of emotions he felt when he had a heart attack.
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Talks about the physical limitations he has, which was difficult at first but now he accepts it.
Talks about the physical limitations he has, which was difficult at first but now he accepts it.
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And it's all those things, all those other physical things because psychologically your heart attack hasn't affected your brain as it were, but they're all physical things that you can't do and at times you get really stupid and do something you really shouldn't have done but if there is a good side to it, the pain soon tells you that you shouldn't be doing that.
And it was that, all physical related tasks that were very, very difficult, either very difficult or you couldn't do, and you knew you weren't to. But gradually with the acceptance of all things, I think, otherwise you'll keep on beating yourself up as you discover new tasks that you can't do but could of done, if I can't do it, sit down, someone else will do it for me.
On some nights he was too frightened to go to sleep if he felt discomfort in his chest.
On some nights he was too frightened to go to sleep if he felt discomfort in his chest.
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Like if you broke your arm in several places and it's cripplingly painful, it's your arm but when your heart hurts, it's kind of, it's the pump that drives the engine kind of thing. You find it really quite frightening and I know it's absurd, I'm not going to go to sleep and two or three hours later you're still awake worrying and that fear was difficult to deal with.
He felt frustrated and angry at not being able to do the things he could before his heart attack.
He felt frustrated and angry at not being able to do the things he could before his heart attack.
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And then the frustration turns in to anger against yourself because again you're going in to this, 'my family are having to do this, am I becoming a burden on my family' and you go down that line of thought then and I know you shouldn't and I mean you can rationally say everything to yourself what needs saying, but when it's you talking to yourself, it's not as successful as when it's somebody else.
You tend not to listen to yourself and the frustration like I say stemmed from not being able to do things that I've done all my life, suddenly I could no longer do them, which impacted on the family as well.
Suddenly we could no longer do this together or that together and the frustration turned to anger as well you know, and really it was an on-going process. I mean, even now, although I deal with it an awful lot better, I don't get frustrated very often, I very, very rarely get angry with situations. Still now and then I will do, but it passes then because I've, in a positive way, I'm in total acceptance of where we are and what's happening.
Reiki helped him to cope with his anger and frustration.
Reiki helped him to cope with his anger and frustration.
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I really truly accepted what had happened to me. And it doesn't sound a lot that doesn't, but the dawn of realisation of, well this is what happened and this is where we are, was so important because at that time, I was so screwed up with anger and frustration, it was just untrue. And again it was unfair on the family because they've just been wonderful, and you find yourself getting very short-tempered with them and very abrasive and that.
So the Reiki didn't cure anything, it didn't help the condition. The enormous thing it did do was, I accepted what had happened to me and the situation I was in. My anger against myself diminished considerably, which was a huge step at the time. I did figuratively, I used to beat myself up daily in a figurative sense; it stopped after that and that was a huge step forward.
Seeing a counsellor helped with his emotional recovery from his heart attack.
Seeing a counsellor helped with his emotional recovery from his heart attack.
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And I think it helps with those and gets you through that stage. And I mean my GP has said, she can't believe anybody who has had a heart attack, at some stage hasn't thought, 'it might be better if it had killed me or something like that and I think the counsellor was just very good in helping me to look at my situation with regard to myself in a different way and see a value in myself, or values in myself from a different perspective than before the heart attack.
Describes the benefits of using a pill box.
Describes the benefits of using a pill box.
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Is it a pill box?
Yes, it's absolutely excellent because before I bought that, that was my wife's suggestion, I used to have to get that lunch box twice a day and go through every one, which it takes me about half an hour on a Sunday, put the entire weeks up, twice a day and then that's it for the week then.
It's a very good investment that is. It's got nothing to do with the fact, oh you can't count, it's purely convenient. If I've got to take my tablets now, it's a thirty second process, instead of ten minutes getting everything out and I find it really good.
He follows a Mediterranean style diet and still enjoys his food.
He follows a Mediterranean style diet and still enjoys his food.
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I enjoy eating now as much as I did before my heart attack and my intake of saturated fats is a lot less than it ever was before my heart attack and it's not a problem it really isn't. And the only tip I give to people who've got to be on it, I'm sure they all know this is always be aware of the claims on the packs of the food you buy.
Like these reduced fat, well it could be 80% reduced to 75% as it were. You need to look and read labels but there's quite a range of food on the market, which fall within that context.
The eating of fruit and vegetables really is not difficult because I enjoy fruit and veg and there's a lovely book they've got at the hospital, it's the 'French Connection.' How in Mediterranean countries they have far smaller incidence of heart attacks than we do and it's five reasons; garlic, olive oil, fresh fruit and veg, oily fish and red wine and I can live with that.
Involve your partner and family in your recovery.
Involve your partner and family in your recovery.
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You're going to get up, get off your backside, we'll go for a walk, or we'll do this' which doesn't sound like enormous things but they are at times and yes, that's really important. And like the woman that did my Reiki, met both of us as a couple and explained and answered my wife's questions as well as mine, and I think it's the family that has to be treated, not just the individual.
If the patient has got children, siblings, partner, it's important that the collective group is treated. Not by forcing information down their throats but if they want to ask something, then making time for them to give them the answer as well, because it's equally important they understand what's happened to this loved one.