Jessy
Jessy experiences urinary retention, infections and leakage. She has been reluctant to seek help following a painful internal examination. She is passionate about women’s health and would like to bring down some of the barriers to accessing health care.
Jessy is originally from Venezuela. She is married and lives with her husband and two sons aged 7 and 15. She about to start a master’s degree in neuroscience at King’s College, London. Jessy describes her ethnicity as Latin.
Conditions: urinary incontinence, urinary retention, UTI
More about me...
Jessy has had problems emptying her bladder since a forceps delivery for her youngest son who is now 7 years old. She feels that this is to do with all the “pushing and prodding”. Jessy describes her bladder as “out of place” and finds that she has to manage her routine strictly around the toilet. She has frequent urinary tract infections and urinary leakage, and manages this by doing pelvic floor exercises, using pads, limiting her fluids, and drinking cranberry juice.
Jessy’s bladder problems prevent her from doing things that she enjoys. She used to really enjoy Zumba and running and at the moment cannot do this because of leaks. As a result of this, Jessy does not feel “free anymore” as she used to feel before her bladder problems.
Jessy is now starting to worry about how she will manage this as she gets older. She does not know what is causing the problem and has concerns that it might indicate something more serious. However, following a previous very painful internal examination, she is extremely reluctant to go to the doctor even though she knows that this might help her. She does not feel that her concerns have always been taken seriously in healthcare.
Jessy has a strong group of female friends who support each other. She has only just started to talk about her bladder problems and her advice to other women is to find someone to support you so that you do not feel that you are doing it alone.
Jessy feels that her life revolves around the toilet, and she no longer feels ‘invincible’ like she used to.
Jessy feels that her life revolves around the toilet, and she no longer feels ‘invincible’ like she used to.
So yeah because it changed me from being kind of like invincible to be more vulnerable, like a, like I’m feeling, feeling invincible, like yeah I can drink and I can do whatever I want and a sense of freedom and like ah, I can do everything, to now I feel I’m feeling vulnerable like Oh God, and this bladder is doing what it wants, I have, I have a little self-control so it’s kind of like my bladder and me. And everything is, my life is kind of like a, rotating around, we just go around the bladder and the toilet breaks.
Jessy hasn’t seen a doctor about her urinary incontinence, as she expects she would need an internal examination. She had distressing previous experiences of internal examinations and having a coil fitted.
Jessy hasn’t seen a doctor about her urinary incontinence, as she expects she would need an internal examination. She had distressing previous experiences of internal examinations and having a coil fitted.
[In past internal examinations and coil fittings I’ve had] they move your parts inside or, or they pull things to, inside you but then I don’t know when are they going to finish so I need somebody to be talking to me and saying, “So listen, I’m doing this and it’s going to be this, it’s doing okay, it’s just be a few more minutes,” and then also to be truthful, because when they said uncomfortable, uncomfortable to me is that you give me a pinch. You pinch my cheek, that’s uncomfortable. Not, what they call uncomfortable is excruciating pain. So, the last time I had, not this time, the previous time I had my, my Mirena coil inserted I was in such an agony, and they said to me, “Oh if you’re feeling much pain we will stop.” And then they didn’t stop, I was sobbing.
I find it [internal examinations] very undignified, you know, you know, I have to take my pants and then they, of course they’re not seeing me naked, I know, of course they put a thing for, just the fact that you have to put your feet on those metal reins and open it up, and then pretend nothing is happening. And then they insert that thing that sometimes is very cold, uncomfortable.
And I’m terrified, I’m just like mm, nah, maybe another day, nah. No. So I’m avoiding it [seeing a doctor about urinary incontinence], I literally avoiding it, consciously avoiding it.
And it’s really worrying because I know that at some point I can actually physically force myself to just to go the doctor, but then for some other people no, and then might not be the case, and then it can cause even more problems, because-, in the long term.
Jessy is interested in having pelvic floor physiotherapy but isn’t sure how to access these services.
Jessy is interested in having pelvic floor physiotherapy but isn’t sure how to access these services.
So, I would, I would like to have more information and know what are the steps that you should be doing, right, and like so should I be going to my GP? Should I be just doing, talk, going to the nurses? Would it be appropriate just to talk to a nurse, for instance? Who can refer me? Do I need, it like, do I need to request a referral, or do you just happen to give me the referral? That’s the part I don’t know. Like do you request, or do they give you the referral? Also so, have a little bit more I don’t know, definitely have more information like it’s all up in the air, when it comes to these things do you just always at the mercy of whoever answer the phone, is how I feel.