Interview 13

Age at interview: 39

Age at diagnosis: 22

Brief Outline:

Testicular cancer (teratoma) diagnosed in 1984; orchidectomy. Secondary tumours found in lungs and abdomen; 4 cycles of chemotherapy (each cycle over three weeks, with 3 days in hospital).

Background:

Manager; married, no children.

Recalls that his family were very supportive and that they hid their own feelings about his illness.

How did your family cope with all this during this time? Were you aware of their reactions at the time?

It was difficult to be, not to be aware. They were supportive but I guess they were also hiding a lot at the same time, their own emotions because they were trying to be strong for me I think. Trying to keep as much normality as possible, but being there when I needed them. And I think that really helped. But then I was a real pig at times I mean because you're doing it for, you've got to do it for yourself, but the way you treat them a little bit can be not so great. And they coped well (laughs) they coped very well with that so I feel very good that they did and you know I apologised to them at the time because sometimes you don't realise what you're like.

Says that when his check-ups came to an end he felt as though part of his support had disappeared.

You're then into a close monitoring system for a long period of time and, get it right, I think it's 10 years at ever increasing intervals. So after the last treatment I think it was every month for a year. I had to go back, have a chest x-ray, occasional CT scan, check there was no reoccurrence, good examination, looking at bloods etc. etc. Then it went to every quarter I think, something like that, then it went to every half a year then once a year and then they say "Well touch wood, you've been clear for 10 years on your way mate, we don't want to see you here again because you know if we do then you've got problems." (Laughs).

What was it like having to go back all the time?

I was quite happy to do it because at least I was being checked. There's a lot of people out there who don't like going to hospitals and aren't being checked and they may have problems so I actually enjoyed it. When I finished it was almost like part of the support disappearing if you like because at least I knew I was having a regular chest x-ray once a year if you like and that was checking for well what it was like. 

Explains why he has not told colleagues at work about his illness.

There are certain people I haven't told. So I've moved companies, moved jobs, I think there's two people in our organisation who do know about my history and only because they have suffered cancer as well. So I try to share with them my feelings, how I coped "Look at me now, big hairy brute." Tried to give them the encouragement to get through. Fortunately they both have. So there's only two people in my current organisation who know that and nobody else knows. It's on my medical records but there's a, you don't share, in my organisation that doesn't get shared out. And I deliberately avoid doing that because I think I might be treated in a different way, in fact I know I would be treated, my experience is I would be treated in a different way. May be you don't get, people think you can't cope or, it gives you a disadvantage in terms of progression may be and things like that. So, and I think it's, I want to be treated normally, right that's me so I don't need to have any special compensation made.