Catherine Y
Catherine experienced problems as a teenager and, after a suicide attempt, was eventually admitted to a young people’s unit. When she was 26, and after a change in medication, she was admitted to hospital where she was offered ECT. Catherine and her husband decided to try different anti-depressants instead of opting for ECT.
Catherine is married, lives with her husband and works as an E-health officer. She describes her ethnic background as White Scottish.
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Catherine struggled when she was at school, and she also had problems with her family. She remembered seeing a school report that said she was ‘in the midst of the doldrums’. She experienced problems with lethargy, poor concentration, sleep, memory and anxiety. Catherine took an overdose when she was 16. Her family were ‘appalled’. Nobody in her family had ever had depression or anxiety – only “stress” which wasn’t seen as a mental health problem. Catherine went to a local psychiatric hospital for six weeks on an adult ward and then was transferred to a young people’s unit. At the time there was no mention of the term “depression” just “adolescent crisis”. Over some weeks she was assessed at this unit, and they diagnosed her with depression and said she had probably been depressed for a couple of years. At the time she didn’t understand the treatment options or the type of support that would be in place.
Catherine stayed on the young people’s unit for about seven or eight months and had a range of treatments. In hindsight she said the services she received were good, although she didn’t always appreciate them fully at the time. Catherine then lived in supported accommodation unit with another girl also from the unit. She did an employment-training scheme and around this time met her future husband. For five years after she left the unit, Catherine had one-to-one support and she also went to a day group with other young people. Later, she left supported accommodation and moved in with her boyfriend. She found she was unable to work and still experienced high levels of apathy.
Later Catherine’s medication was changed, she lost a couple of stone in weight and began to struggle with anxiety issues. She ended up in hospital before the Christmas of ‘97 and her medication was changed again. She was discharged, but said she felt no different to she had done when she was admitted. She went to another city and tried to kill herself. Catherine phoned the Samaritans who told her to phone the police, and she ended up being transferred to a hospital near her home. During this admission to hospital, ECT was mentioned for the first time. It was explained to her that if she had ECT she would maybe not have to stay so long in hospital. Overall, she found the staff quite difficult and the environment unsupportive. Her husband looked at the Royal College of Psychiatrists and the NHS websites, and printed information for her. Both Catherine and her husband had real concerns about ECT. Catherine had more mixed feelings about ECT whereas her husband was strongly against it. She felt that it was natural that her husband was involved in the decision as they had been together quite a few years by this point. Catherine had seen some patients who had had good experiences of ECT but she had also seen some patients who had been badly affected by ECT. She decided to take newer medication instead and although things started to improve with her mental well-being she did gain a huge amount of weight. She said the staff presented her with the decision to have ECT and left her to it, but she wanted to be given more information. Catherine knew about ECT but still wanted to know more about the potential side effects such as memory loss and why people sometimes struggled to walk just as they came around. She thinks that it is an individual decision whether or not to have ECT. Catherine felt that as medication had worked for her in the past, she felt there was a chance that it would work again. She felt it is really important for staff to be empathetic in the way they explain something like ECT and to give patients all the information.
After this admission she was determined not return to hospital. She found a support worker from a mental health charity and started exercising. Over a 4-5 year period she really improved. She had a few ‘wobbly patches’ but after 2000, she hasn’t had a hospital admission. She did an Open University course and says that she has now gone back to working full time – something she did gradually. She continues to take antidepressant medication. She now has a few other physical health problems that are frustrating.
Catherine Y first became depressed as a teenager. There was no history of mental health in the family and she felt isolated and didn’t feel she could speak to her family.
Catherine Y first became depressed as a teenager. There was no history of mental health in the family and she felt isolated and didn’t feel she could speak to her family.
So I had really felt quite isolated.
It was some time before Catherine Y received a diagnosis of ‘depression’. At first she was relieved, but then she didn’t know what it meant, or what treatment might be available.
It was some time before Catherine Y received a diagnosis of ‘depression’. At first she was relieved, but then she didn’t know what it meant, or what treatment might be available.
Catherine Y talked about the kind of practical and emotional support her husband gave her.
Catherine Y talked about the kind of practical and emotional support her husband gave her.
You were saying you sort of use the term “carer” quite loosely.
Yes.
Is that… how would you sort of define that?
Well, I don’t know. I mean it, it’s not quite the same as caring for somebody physically, I mean they’re not caring to the point where somebody is having to get you physically out of bed and dress you and, it’s not that type of caring. The caring is kind of more emotionally caring and caring for your safety, caring to make sure you’re okay. I mean he would ma-, I mean he makes, he still does actually, it’s a pattern that’s continued to this day, he makes the, he makes the tea every night. But he’s done that from the very beginning and that was part of his caring role then, making me dinner and kind of to help with the housework, sharing the chores. I was, because I was quite apathetic a lot of the time, quite tired, very often didn’t get up till lunchtime, you know, the he had a part to play as a carer. But he’s my husband. So I kind of, I don’t know, it’s a, it’s, I don’t know if there’s any other word for it, but he was, he was supportive.
Catherine Y gradually improved on medication, although she gained weight. With help from a charity she started running. She took a course with the Open University and now works as a support worker.
Catherine Y gradually improved on medication, although she gained weight. With help from a charity she started running. She took a course with the Open University and now works as a support worker.
Catherine Y was asked whether she wanted to have ECT or change her medication. She decided against ECT because she didn’t know enough about it.
Catherine Y was asked whether she wanted to have ECT or change her medication. She decided against ECT because she didn’t know enough about it.
And what did you think ECT was? I mean you described sort of having seen it on TV and that sort of thing.
Well, that, yes, that’s exactly it. That’s, that’s, I thought it, well, I really thought, you see people, I mean they talk about obviously being, you know, being given an anaesthetic to be given ECT, and I’m thinking, “Well, why do people jump about when they’re given ECT? You know, I don’t know. What’s that about?” And then coming round, obviously other patients, you see them when they’re coming round. They didn’t know where they were, they couldn’t walk properly, having a really severe headache, memory loss, quite significant for some people afterwards. And somebody did say that they felt that they’d been permanently damaged by it. And all of that kind of information, it was like, “Well, actually I don’t think I want to, really want to go through with this.”
You were saying somebody said, was that from literature or somebody you knew?
It was in the, in the wards, yes, it was other people in the wards kind of saying, saying things like that. And I think it probably would have been more helpful to have had some discussion with the medical team exactly to clarify all the different kind of questions that I had about it and my husband had about it. And to also cla-, sort of explain to them what I’d heard from other patients and actually, “Is, are these experiences real experiences and is it something to watch out for? What, what’s the percentage of incidence of that happening?” that kind of thing. But there was no kind of information that came forward about that.
Catherine Y wanted to be able to clarify with the medical team things she’d heard from other patients about ECT.
Catherine Y wanted to be able to clarify with the medical team things she’d heard from other patients about ECT.
And what did you think ECT was? I mean you described sort of having seen it on TV and that sort of thing.
Well, that, yes, that’s exactly it. That’s, that’s, I thought it, well, I really thought, you see people, I mean they talk about obviously being, you know, being given an anaesthetic to be given ECT, and I’m thinking, “Well, why do people jump about when they’re given ECT? You know, I don’t know. What’s that about?” And then coming round, obviously other patients, you see them when they’re coming round. They didn’t know where they were, they couldn’t walk properly, having a really severe headache, memory loss, quite significant for some people afterwards. And somebody did say that they felt that they’d been permanently damaged by it. And all of that kind of information, it was like, “Well, actually I don’t think I want to, really want to go through with this.”
You were saying somebody said, was that from literature or somebody you knew?
It was in the, in the wards, yes, it was other people in the wards kind of saying, saying things like that. And I think it probably would have been more helpful to have had some discussion with the medical team exactly to clarify all the different kind of questions that I had about it and my husband had about it. And to also cla-, sort of ex-, explain to them what I’d heard from other patients and actually, “Is, are these experiences real experiences and, and is it something to watch out for? What h-, what’s the percentage of incidence of that happening?” that kind of thing. But there was, there was no kind of information that came forward about that.
And I think, I think I just, I just didn’t know enough about it. There was too much kind of, you know, “What does it do to the brain? They told me the understanding of how it works, but what does it do?” And I think if you’ve got that gap where you don’t know everything about it, I don’t know if you can really, it’s an individual decision, I think.
Catherine Y’s husband researched ECT on the internet when it was offered to her. Cathy had a negative impression of it from other people and from the TV, and decided to try different medication instead.
Catherine Y’s husband researched ECT on the internet when it was offered to her. Cathy had a negative impression of it from other people and from the TV, and decided to try different medication instead.
Catherine Y spent time on a young person’s ward when she was a teenager. They did art therapy and drama therapy, which created a better way for the teenagers to explain their feelings.
Catherine Y spent time on a young person’s ward when she was a teenager. They did art therapy and drama therapy, which created a better way for the teenagers to explain their feelings.
Catherine Y found that she had to keep changing anti-depressants because of the side effects or because they stopped working after a while. It was difficult but they did help her overall.
Catherine Y found that she had to keep changing anti-depressants because of the side effects or because they stopped working after a while. It was difficult but they did help her overall.
Yes, it was imipramine, I went on to imipramine. The lethargy got, the sedation got a bit too much over a period of time and I went on to the same group but without the sedation, a medication called lofepramine, which I think is the lower one of the group of tricyclics that doesn’t have sedation in it. And I was on that for a good couple of years before that kind of stopped working. I think antidepressants with me occasionally did have a habit of just stopping working, it would be a case of trying another one. But, no, it was, yes, and I still had a long way to go, there was still a long way to go and I still at times felt suicidal and, you know, self-harm and all that kind of stuff. So it was still quite difficult but I think it still helped me to, I think, work better within, certainly in psychotherapy sessions and things like that.