Interview 13- Intensive care: family experiences

Age at interview: 40
Brief Outline:

In 2006 her husband had liver disease and pneumonia and sadly died in ICU. She has gained strength from having counselling and from her spirituality.

Background:

Social services employee, widowed with one child. Ethnic background/nationality: White British.

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Intensive care staff were open with her about how seriously ill her husband was. They left the...

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Intensive care staff were open with her about how seriously ill her husband was. They left the...

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So he [husband] was in the ward and he developed pneumonia and went into Intensive Care? 

 
Yes. 
 
How long was he in Intensive Care when he went to the hospital? 
 
The first time? 
 
Yes. 
 
He was in Intensive Care for a week exactly. Yes. 
 
Then in High Dependency for...? 
 
Six days and then he was back in Intensive Care three days. Two days actually. Yes.
 
So when he went into the general ward the first time, he went into the general ward after having tests? 
 
Yes. 
 
So you knew he was going in? 
 
Yes. 
 
Did you know at that stage what would be happening next? 
 
No. We knew from the results of the scan that he was very, very, very poorly and after our first day there, at the hospital, the doctor there did explain to us exactly what was going on. And he was very, very, very honest with us. You see that is one of the good things about this particular hospital is that they have got a - they believe that honesty is the best policy and that it is better to be very, very open about everything then it is to sort of hide things and so I knew…. 
 
You appreciated that? 
 
Exactly. What was going on. 
 
And on the day that he passed away. Were you there at the time. Or did you receive a phone call? 
 
I was there. Well he had been deteriorating all day. His oxygen levels were dropping and they had given him everything, everything really and the doctor explained that they reach a point of what they call futility when there isn't anything else they can do really. 
 
The doctors explained that to you or the nurses? 
 
Yes, they did. Both actually, doctors and the nurses. And then it was about 3 o'clock in the morning. I did actually stay over that night and the nurse came in and said, “He has reached that stage” and asked whether I liked for them to carry on sort of trying anything. But really by then I had seen him being prodded about, you know, needles being stuck in every bit of him, and I just thought it is better to let him go really. So they stopped the drugs that were keeping his blood pressure up and he died at 5.15 that morning.