Living with dying
Hospice in-patient care
Hospices aim to meet people's physical, emotional, social and spiritual needs. Some people need particular help in controlling pain or other symptoms, and may be admitted for a short while if a bed is available (see 'Insufficient hospice care'). Many of those admitted return home after a few days, when symptoms have been controlled.
A few hospices offer respite care to those who are seriously ill, though this is increasingly rare. Many offer day care support to those who can stay at home (see 'Hospice day care'), and some offer short-term intensive home support (see 'Care at home: nursing').
Hospices strive to offer dignity, peace and calm at the end of life. People who are dying may be able to remain in a hospice, receiving expert care from doctors, nurses, social workers, counsellors, physiotherapists, and other members of the team, until they die.
A few of those we talked to had spent some time in a hospice as an in-patient. One woman, for example, went into a hospice for respite care for two weeks every three months.
Some people compared care in a hospice with care in a hospital, and said that hospice care was more relaxed. For example, one man said he could get up if he felt well enough or he could stay in bed as he wished. He wasn't 'forced' out of bed. People also mentioned that in their experience hospices (which are usually funded by charities) were better staffed than hospitals, which meant that nurses had much more time to sit and talk and attend to all their other needs.
Says a hospice is more relaxed than a hospital and he is never forced out of bed.
Says a hospice is more relaxed than a hospital and he is never forced out of bed.
And that's another thing with the Marie Curie, when... In the Marie Curie it's not like a hospital, it's more of a 'oh just do what you want to do', you know you're just going to be... sort of just get up at 12 o'clock, have a wash, because obviously there's a lot of ill people in these places who haven't got long to go like, but the general atmosphere is just one of a very relaxed sort of nursing, yeah. Great.
Some people imagined that a hospice would be a depressing place. One woman who we talked to found it very upsetting to realise that other people had died during her stay.
Others were pleasantly surprised. A man who had at first said he wanted to die at home had changed his mind after getting to know the hospice.
Many talked about the peaceful environment. A woman with lung cancer described the calm atmosphere and the excellent care she received. Food was prepared exactly as she wanted it, and pre-dinner drinks were available. She was offered complementary therapies, including music therapy, which she found helpful.
The care she received in the hospice was 'amazing' and she would happily return there.
The care she received in the hospice was 'amazing' and she would happily return there.
My brother, sorry, my son took me, and it sounds strange but we both said this, as you walk in, it is a beautiful place but as you walked in you felt a blanket come over you of calmness and care. And the staff were just amazing, absolutely amazing. They really did care. Genuinely care and pandered to my every whim. Whatever I wanted I could have. They were always there for me, they remembered everything. And the first day I heard the trolley coming along the corridor - clonk, clonk, clonk - and I thought oh it's the time for medicine, but it wasn't, it was the drinks trolley for the pre-dinner drinks.
Oh yes.
Which sort of sums it up. Meal times they always asked you, they didn't give you a menu, they asked you what you would like and I like toast in the morning and it came up fresh, still with the butter melting. You know there was that much care.
The little things, yes. And they would sit and talk to you and I know I had a room on my own but I didn't see anybody die.
I wasn't aware of anyone dying because that would have absolutely terrified me. And if... When I have to go back again I'd be quite, quite happy to do so. In fact some days when I'm really poorly and I sit here and I think 'oh it would be nice to be in the hospice and be looked after', but then no, I'm not giving in to it.
Describes the hospice, its facilities, the various complementary therapies, and peaceful environment.
Describes the hospice, its facilities, the various complementary therapies, and peaceful environment.
And there is another thing, I've totally forgotten. They have a music room in the hospice with every conceivable instrument and they asked me if I would like to meet the musician and have a session with him, and I said, 'Well I'm not musical-minded. I cannot read music. I don't play the trumpet, the violin, the piano, anything.' And they said, 'No, that's not the point of it,' and I agreed. And this very charming gentleman took me in to this room and sat me in front of the drums and just said, 'Just do what you want.'
And I could see where he was coming from, to get that, feelings out, banging on the drums and also he had me at the piano and of course I didn't know what to do but I did find that, oh it sounds all rather silly doesn't it, but that was interesting, that was intriguing that they felt that music would help.
Oh, I'm glad you remembered that.
Yes, if you physically play the instruments...
Is there a chapel at the hospice?
No, no.
If you wanted to get out to church could they take you?
Oh yes, yes and you could also go out.
Hmm.
You see one day my son came over with the children and there is a play room there fully fitted with toys, even a computer for them to play on. But it was a lovely day so they took me out for lunch and then brought me back and that was very nice.
It sounds like a wonderful place.
Oh it is, it is. Yes, yes. So what have they got? They've got the hairdressers, the music room, the aromatherapy room, a room for friends and family to stay overnight if need be. A day room where you can meet and you know have a coffee and do whatever. A dining room if you want to go and have your meals in the dining room and as I said beautiful rooms with en-suite facilities. And this wonderful feeling of peace.
A man with prostate cancer had two spells in a hospice. He was impressed by the efficient organisation, and the way in which his pain was controlled (see also 'Pain and pain control').
He was impressed by the organisation and with the way the doctors at the hospice managed to control his pain.
He was impressed by the organisation and with the way the doctors at the hospice managed to control his pain.
I went to the hospice a couple of times. The first time it was to check the reasons for pain and identify the best means of attacking it. During these tests it was noticed that I was anaemic. And the second time I went into the hospice was for a blood transfusion. They gave me quite a lot of blood, and that is why I was there for a number of days. Those were the reasons for the hospice visits.
What was it like there, as a patient?
It was very nice. The people were very kind, and I was absolutely amazed at the organisation. The number of staff, number of patients, all had different, different ailments, and everything worked like clockwork. I was very impressed. I wish we could have some of that in industry.
And how did they manage to sort the pain out?
By choosing correct medication, whereas elsewhere the GPs were struggling with different medications. I found the consultants in the hospice were able to tell me straight off what was the matter and the first medication they offered worked. It happened twice. That's why I was very impressed.
The staff do their best to help patients and their families. One woman mentioned that there was a playroom for visiting children. Another person said that his local hospice had a special room for people wishing to smoke.
Rooms are sometimes available for relatives who wish to spend the night. One woman was allowed to stay in the hospice when her husband was dying. She was given a bed beside him in a private room and was there the night he died.
For more information and help finding a hospice see our Resources page.
Last reviewed July 2017.
Last updated July 2017.
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