Christian

Age at interview: 28

Brief Outline:

Christian described his symptoms as “incredibly mild” when he caught Covid in March 2020. As time went by he became less and less “capable and able” and by the summer he had breathlessness and fatigue. An antibody test in June confirmed he had had Covid. By September, his fatigue and breathlessness had become worse. He was largely bedbound, sleeping most of the time, finding it incredibly difficult to breathe and only working online for two hours a week because he was too fatigued to do any more. Since then, through doing breathing exercises and using an inhaler, his breathlessness has improved. Christian proactively manages his fatigue by deciding each day what to spend his energy on so that he can be in better health to look after his young child and help his wife. He now works four days a week in an administrative job, with a day off midweek to rest. Christian was interviewed in March 2022.

Christian is married with a 16-month year old daughter. He was working as a primary school teacher in March 2020 when he caught Covid.

More about me...

Christian was working as a primary school teacher when he developed Covid in March 2020. His wife, who was pregnant, also developed Covid at the same time. He said his initial illness “was incredibly mild” in that he didn’t feel the need to take paracetamol. As time went by, he became more breathless, with fatigue and brain fog to the point where he was largely bedbound and sleeping most of the time. In September, he went to his doctor and had several tests including a chest X-ray which showed nothing. His doctor diagnosed him with Long Covid and said that other people were experiencing the same symptoms.

For a few months Christian got mildly better but it was very much day to day. In November, his baby was born and he says the adrenaline got him through the next few months. However, by the beginning of 2021 he was bed bound again. He got in contact with the Long Covid services in his local area which helped him to work out how to manage his fatigue.

Since then, Christian has been working on managing his breathing. Through a course with the English National Opera, recommended to him by the Long Covid unit, and with the use of an inhaler, his breathlessness is gradually improving. He has noticed an improvement after each Covid vaccination as well.

Christian feels his life “has been completely turned upside down” by having Long Covid; he can no longer work as a teacher and he has an administrative job four days a week, with a day off mid-week to rest. He says, “I used to have a career, now I’d say I have a job.”

Long Covid has affected what he can do with his daughter; he gets very tired and can only manage two half-hour walks a week where he pushes his daughter in her pushchair without having any adverse effects. The rest of the time he says his life is very sedentary, which is not how it used to be. He says “it’s deeply saddening seeing a picture of her on our friend’s shoulders at a farm instead of mine.” He plays with his daughter on the floor to conserve his energy because he knows any more exertion will have a detrimental effect on his ability to work or help his wife with caring for their child or their home. Christian says his wife is exhausted and it’s “a real strain” on her as she works full time as a teacher and is caring for their young child.

Christian has realised that he has to actively manage his fatigue. At first when he started feeling better he would go back to how he used to be, being very proactive and working hard, but then realised he was having one good day followed by two or three bad days. Now, he’s changed how he approaches his day. He’s eliminated all exercise because it wipes him out. He can manage one social interaction a week. Some weeks he chooses not to have the social interaction so that he can have better health to spend with his wife and daughter. His days are a balance between not doing something one day so he can look after his daughter the next.

Christian has tried to learn as much as he can about Long Covid through articles in open access medical journals to find out the most up-to-date information. He tries not to think about the future, but he would like to be the father he envisioned he would be, although he does not currently feel hopeful that there will be a change in his condition.

Christian’s advice to other people managing Long Covid with a young family is to try and manage your life in a way that you strip away all non-essentials and to work out what is most important to you and how to prioritise that. For Christian, his daughter and wife are what’s important to him, and he makes time spent with them his priority.

Christian has had to limit his social interactions, but feels like he is missing out on valuable time with his young daughter.

And equally, you know, I have the capacity to do... but, you know, unfortunately it’s not just physical things, it can be stressful things or just busy being busy and having lots to do. I can do one, kind of, external social interaction a week. Anymore, and it’s just too much with family life and my health, and, you know, previously who didn’t like seeing their friends? Like, I know it’s a different world now, post-Covid but, you know, that’s... that’s it, and often I would rather not have the social interaction so that I can be in better health to spend time with my daughter or wife.

Luckily I had a variety of interests before having Long Covid, so there is a lot I can do just sat down, but, you know, as a... someone who used to teach, I’m well aware of all the developmental things I’m missing with my daughter that she is getting from other places like nursery, or my wife, or when she goes out with my wife and my friends. But, you know, it’s deeply saddening seeing a picture of her on our friend’s shoulders out at a farm, than mine. So I’ve, kind of, had to learn to accept my limitations.

Christian says that because of his Long Covid, his wife sometimes gets resentful and cross as she “effectively has to be a single parent” and carer on some days.

So, I normally take my daughter to nursery because I’m in the car because I need to drive, so my wife has to take her. If it’s a weekend she’s sometimes taken my daughter to work, which... because she does... because my wife is Head of rowing, it’s rowing activities and, you know, I’m sure the children like to see my daughter, but it’s... and it’s cute for my wife, it’s hugely inconvenient for her. So yeah, and it’s... there’s no real way of factoring it into your plans if on a given day... my wife’s described it as, you know, kind of, sometimes she effectively has to be a single parent, but then more actually, because she also feels like she has to look after me as well, so it’s, sort of, like a single parent and carer on these days, which is deeply unfair but... and then, you know, you get... and the weird situation, so it’s like ‘I need to not do that thing, which is useful now for you, so that I can be good tomorrow for when you need me to be able to look after my daughter, our daughter’, which obviously... my wife’s very open about it, you know, she’ll say, “I feel resentful or cross because I have to do the cooking and the washing up, and then do my work, whereas you have to go to bed,” and, you know, it’s fair enough really. And we have a very, in terms of communication, open relationship where we do talk to each other. Like, I mean... and it’s really hard, right? I can’t imagine what it must be like for people in other situations where there isn’t that level of understanding or communication going on.

Christian tried not to think about the future because he didn’t know how hopeful to be about getting better.

You know, do you have hope for the future that you’ll...you’ll improve or how do you feel, sort of, currently about that?

How do I feel about whether I’ll improve?... I mean of course I would like to be who I was before I had Long Covid, very much be the father I envisioned I would be. Whether I’m hopeful? To be honest, I try not to think about it because I don’t know how hopeful I am. I know some people have had Long Covid for a bit and then recovered. Some people have been more drawn out, like myself. We don’t know enough and that’s both a blessing and a curse in that regards, right? One of...and given that Covid’s going to be more pervasive as a disease more generally, I actually had Covid again for a fortnight...no, sorry, a fortnight ago and I was, kind of like, maybe it will function similarly to a vaccine and it’s too early to tell but actually my health seems to be getting worse again, so I don’t know. I would say I’m not...it’s not that I’m not hopeful for the future, but it’s that I’m not hopeful that there would be any substantial change in my condition because I don’t see any reason why it would change from theories or papers I read online.

Christian said you had to prioritise what was most important to you, which in his case was quality time with his family.

My advice would be try and manage your life in a way that you strip away all non-essentials, whether that means social interactions or type of work activities. You know, you've really got to work out what is most important to you and how to prioritise that. For me, that was being able to spend quality time with my wife and daughter because I can’t do that, but that’s meant that my professional life has had to suffer. You know, I used to have a career; now I’d say I have a job. It’s a good job, but it’s not a career, and that was a sacrifice I’m willing to make [laughs]. Similarly, you know, less pay, quality of life, that sort of thing. But time is more valuable to me to spend with my family. But that’s…you've got to decide for yourself and try and make it work, right, within what’s realistic, i.e., in terms of what you can do and still survive. So, no easy fix.