Interview 43

Age at interview: 54

Brief Outline:

She encouraged her husband (interview number PSA27) to have a PSA test, but with the wisdom of hindsight she regrets this. Says that the consequences of the test (her husband's biopsy and its side-effects), affected her husband's sexual confidence for months.

Background:

Occupation' Psychosexual therapist & relationship counsellor. Marital status' married. Number of children' 2. Ethnic background' White British.

Regrets encouraging her husband (Interview 27) to have a PSA test. Also says her husband's shocking experience affected their sexual relationship

Right the two things that I feel now with the wisdom of hindsight. One, I would never have nagged my husband [laughs] to go for a PSA test, and I think that everything that happened after the PSA test had a slight air of panic and hysteria to it and so that I, I regret that, I regret that I was part of that. I didn't appreciate how very hit and miss the PSA test was, so that's the first thing. And the second thing to me was, and may be this is even more important is that it seems such a sin of omission on the part of the consultant, on any medical person, not to explain to a lay person what happens to you when you have 22 biopsies to your prostate and that you do ejaculate blood. And for a lay person, especially for a man I think who's not used to bleeding, it had an incredible effect on my husband and, and it subsequently obviously had an effect on me because I love him very much and it took us about 18 months to get over that [coughs]. So I feel why on earth didn't someone say something so simple as 'put a condom on', so the first time you ejaculate you are containing the drama as it were and also preparing. And so for me as the wife, I've been dealing with trauma, I've been dealing with my husband being sexually traumatised and so that I've had, a lot of; my regret is about is that; and I'm really glad about, I suppose about my job I'm a psychosexual therapist and I felt quite confident about us having a very good sexual relationship and being able to play my part in reassuring him but we should never have been put in that position. So that's really what I want to say that if there are any medical people that are going to watch this, think, can you please think of what consequences are to people in their sexual relationships and, and the negative ripples that it sent out for us for months and months.